New House Education

As the regular readers of my blog know, Sunshine Cindy and I are in the process of moving from our current house to a slightly bigger house with a pool. Sunshine Cindy is a big fan of HGTV and the fixer upper type of shows. Because of her viewing habits and our house hunting, she has taught me many new terms related to houses.

Thankfully we are not buying a house that we will have to have a “demo day.” Every show that I watch has a demo day and all the hosts are always super excited about this day as they get to literally destroy everything in their path. Demo day is like a field day in school when you got to play all day. Except their playing happens to rip stuff apart.

One thing I learned right away was we will never have a popcorn ceiling. I always thought popcorn was for eating. Since when did they start putting that stuff on ceilings? We walked into one house and the first thing I heard was, “That popcorn has to go.” Who knew???

Another thing those shows have taught Sunshine Cindy is everyone tears down walls but you have to be careful it is not a “load-bearing” wall. A what? Don’t all walls have loads they bear. I watched as she would walk around houses tapping on walls wondering if they were load-bearing. Thankfully we won’t be tearing any walls down, load bearing or not bearing anything.

What the hell is “subway tile?” And why do so many houses now have this type of tile? Has there been a run on old abandoned subway stations for their tile? And where did “shiplap” boards come from all of a sudden? Why can’t we use just regular wood boards. Do they get shiplap from ships? This is all so confusing.

There was a time when everyone had a good old kitchen countertop encased in linoleum. Now you have so many choices to choose from your head will spin. Who knew there are so many different types of countertops you can get.
1. Granite
2. Marble
3. Soapstone
4. Quartzite
5. Slate
6. Limestone
7. Engineered Stone
8. Quartz
9. Engineered Granite
10. Engineered Marble
11. Concrete

And this is just a partial list. I think our new place has one of these countertop types in our kitchen so we should be good to go. I hope! And speaking of kitchens, when did everyone want to go back to the days of farmers and start having a “farm sink?” That seems to be at odds with the trend to stainless steel appliances. No wonder I am so confused.

I want to know when the Master Bathroom changed to an “Ensuite Bathroom.” Is this supposed to sound more sophisticated? Is it easier to poop in an Ensuite Bathroom than a Master Bathroom? Who started this marketing campaign? I want to meet this person because they have effectively removed the term Master Bath from our vocabulary.

While we are in the Ensuite Bathroom, can someone tell me the difference between a soaking bathtub and a regular tub? And does anyone actually use the jets that all these tubs now seem to have? I have a feeling the tub in our new Ensuite Bathroom might be on the way out to get something more with the times. Maybe we can put some subway tile around it!

When it’s all said and done you want a house with “curb appeal.” Personally I would rather have “living like a king appeal” but no one asked me when the house street jargon was being updated.

Okay, off my soapbox…We had a busy week last week with many things going on with the houses. We had inspections, more paperwork to fill out and plans to move being made. On top of all that we laid to rest our good friend Kenny. The funeral was Friday and I was a pallbearer. It was an emotional day. The procession to the cemetery must have been at least a ½ mile long. It was an amazing outpouring of love for Kenny. He will be missed.

Friday night was a Parrot Head meeting at Landshark where we celebrated Kenny’s life. It was a good time to remember the great times we all had. Before the meeting Sunshine Cindy, Wayne, Judie, Kelly and myself went to Harry T’s for some happy hour drinks. Dan bought us a round in honor of Kenny. It was good seeing Susan, Mike and Red behind the bar.

The rest of the weekend was spent packing. Progress is being made but we still have a ways to go.

I have mentioned the Gumbo Pot a couple times wondering when it would open. I guess I waited too long. I’m not sure it ever opened but it is already closed and a new Italian restaurant has opened in its place. I don’t know what happened to have this change so fast.

Okay, a busy week house wise coming up. Plus the Parrot Heads have a beach cleanup this Saturday that I would love to attend but we shall see.

Have a great week. See ya next Monday!

Destin Steve